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11 ways to stop being shallow when dating - Love Connection
When I started online dating six years ago, I was so overwhelmingly unprepared. I mean really, how hard could it be? Swipe right. Message a bit, online dating shallow people. Go on a date. If I liked them, go on a few more. But online dating has never been that simple for me. I went in expecting the best from people. But too pretty darn often, people have been just the worst.
Searching for a real meaningful connection has felt an impossible task when met with this constant reaffirmation that online dating is fundamentally shallow.
Am I sounding a little negative? Okay so maybe everyone embellishes slightly, but sometimes people portray a different person entirely. I once dated a guy who told me he was Irish and did a pretty decent attempt at an accent. He also gave me a false name and implied he was an actor. I think you know the online dating shallow people ending here. Yep, you guessed it, they were of course all lies. Another turned out to still have a wife, online dating shallow people, now that was a not so fun experience.
And then there was the one who turned out to be a good decade older than his profile or pictures suggested. All faking a range of attributes including name, marital status, location and appearance. their online profile. Because that online dating profile can be deceiving as hell. Is anyone really going to learn anything valuable about me if I tell them that I occasionally binge watch Made in Chelsea? Have an obsession with horror novels, and watch Muppets Christmas Carol nearly every single Christmas?
Because profile pictures remain one of the most important elements of an online dating profile to many. You end up stressing over every image, trying to find the best angles and perfect poses, because the physical is prioritised over everything else.
And with such high importance on image alone, occasionally online dating feels like an everybody catfishing everybody scenario. Because sometimes it feels like every guy wants a Michelle Keegan or similar. And every girl wants Brad Pitt or his equivalent.
So how online dating shallow people anyone compete when the stakes are so high and profile pictures are so important online dating shallow people a swipe?. Requests for further photos are common. And quite often come as a semi-naked or a full naked photo request in an attempt to get a little extra with that investigation into the jeans size, online dating shallow people.
However online dating seems to purely concentrate on the physical, the images, the somewhat non-meaningful data that leaves the really good stuff; personality, emotional and mental connection, those things are backbenched as the least important of all. I have more …. This all inevitably leads to one thing; Upping notches on the bedpost. It hurts. Oh I feel you, Shani. Many will state they are looking for a relationship when in fact, they want casual fun only. And what can be even more mentally draining is ascertaining whether you are OK with those intentions.
I enjoy sex. So much so that online dating shallow people the odd occasion I like to have it. But online dating has at times, felt like a cycle of scratching an itch via deceit and un-honest intentions.
And all of it, this whole online dating situation, it just keeps serving as a reminder that a permanent back scratcher seems like an impossible task. A whole host of casual references that come on fast and hint to a future relationship. Somehow in all that shallow, you found a keeper.
But, sometimes it is just too good to be true. But trust me, mosting is like ghosting, only worse. So my advice in any and all dating scenarios? Stop and calm the fuck down. And it takes time to really get to know a person IRL. Online dating provides a big old number of hurdles to get over. And in my experience, it can create a false sense of connection and commitment, online dating shallow people. Actions really do speak louder than words here. Online dating offers an extensive array of platforms to peruse and meet new people.
However it is also appearance prioritised, extremely difficult to truly connect with a person and deceit is rife!
Success is definitely possible, despite my slightly biased experience and opinion of it. But online dating is also fundamentally shallow. Is online dating fundamentally shallow? If it is, is there a way to fix the flaws? Hit me with your thoughts! Share your comments and experiences below, or to share your own story and offload some Real Talk on online dating Click Here.
Amy is the Founder and Editor of The Authentic Optimist. She talks all things life. From the highs to the lows, to all those messy bits in-between.
She is a writer, online dating shallow people, rambler, lover of carbs her true soulmate and she is especially passionate about dispelling myths about women in their 30s.
Amy lives in Lincolnshire with her two greyhounds. Search for:. The Authentic Optimist Dating Is online dating fundamentally shallow? What you need to know to prepare. Facebook Instagram Pinterest Twitter When I started online dating six years ago, I was so overwhelmingly unprepared. November 23, 10 Signs Of A Toxic Relationship You Need To Know.
March 6, Dating Life: Please Start Respecting My Sexual Boundaries. September 14, This was truly solo travel. Scary AF, but I was hoping, totally worth it. By Amy Roullier Amy is the Founder and Editor of The Authentic Optimist.
Amy The Authentic Optimist. February 22, Navigating the dating virtual marketplace in my 30s: I want quality not quantity. February 25, What online dating shallow people expect when going through a divorce in your 30s. Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form. Next Post Navigating the dating virtual marketplace in my 30s: I want quality not quantity. Follow on Instagram. Terms of Use. Privacy Policy. This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website.
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When You Date a Shallow Person - Dating Advice
, time: 10:55Is online dating fundamentally shallow? What you need to know
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